Plausible Marketing Strategy?

Ask any kid what the quintessential flavor for their favorite high fructose corn syrup laden treat is and first thing they'll do is ask you what quintessential means. Once that's cleared up though they'll undoubtedly tell you it's cherry. Red Kool Aid mustaches are a permanent fixture on most kids during the summertime, and right now in households all across America kids are fighting over the last red popsicle while a pile of their orange flavored bastard cousins go untouched. The cherry red flavoring is so popular that even Lifesavers marketed a roll devoted just to it.


No longer a child myself, I still indulge in sugary snacks and am more than happy to have a pile of Swedish Fish for lunch. Being the connoisseur I am I will say that while grape is a close second I have to admit that when it comes to candy cherry is still my favorite flavor. Nostalgia? Maybe, but I just think it tastes so much better than other artificial flavorings.


I bought a movie theatre style box of Runts at the store the other day. I love Runts, especially the cherry and lime because they're more tangy than the other flavors. I like to eat a cherry and lime together, it's like a fruit flavored party in my mouth. I hate the banana ones (does anyone eat those because I just throw them away) and could take or leave the orange and strawberry. Are you getting the point of why I bought the box of Runts? Now I'm hoping you can use your excellent deduction skills to figure out which two flavors had been replaced.


Yep, that's right, cherry and lime were gone, removed by none other than Mr. Willy Wonka himself. I felt betrayed until I tasted the two flavors that replaced my beloved cherry and lime, then I was just offended. The two new flavors are mango and pineapple. Why would they remove the most popular candy flavor known to man to replace it with these miniature replica's of exotic fruit? I have to admit the pineapple tasted like a pineapple - that had been doused in preservatives and sucrose. The mango, well that tasted like sweat socks. For the first time ever a box of candy has been sitting around my house for weeks uneaten.




When I was taking the pictures to go along with this story I took a closer look at the box. The new flavors are announced in Spanish and kind of hidden in English. They don't say they took away cherry and lime (false advertising) but then again I don't see a cherry rollerblading on there either. I guess it's just another marketing effort aimed at America's ever growing population of Spanish consumers. I totally feel like I got the shaft.