Lazlo is my co-pilot

Like everything else razor blades keep getting fancier... and more expensive. I have two razor's the Venus and the Quattro(which came free in the mail). I don't really prefer one over the other but having two gives me options in case one brand of cartridges is on sale.

I recently found myself standing in the razor isle at Wal-Mart starring at the price break down looking for a deal. Frankly $9.00 seemed a little steep to me. I mean is that why they sent me a free razor in the mail - to fleece me when I needed a refill?

Then I noticed the Bic Soleil which was moderately priced at five bucks and change. It seemed too good to be true so I carefully inspected the packaging. The Solei had three blades and you got the razor and three cartridges in total plus a money saving coupon inside - Sweet! I grabbed one, finished my shopping, and headed home. I was stoked to open my new goodies, yes fellas girls do get excited over this crap, and mount the new razor in my shower where it could mingle with it's peers.

And then it happened, I used it, not once but twice. The first time I used it I could tell it wasn't the smoothest of shaves. It made my skin feel raw immediately and I got giant nicks on my ankles -bleeders to boot. My legs were on fire the whole day, still in two days time I would repeat the whole process again. Why? Because I couldn't stand the thought of spending money on something I was going to have to throw away. Yes I know it was less than six bucks, but it's the principal. I was hoping it was just a bumpy first ride. Nope, it was the Soleil, I used it again with the same result as the first shave, only this time I had cuts on the backs of my knees too. By this point I felt like an idiot.


Quickly though, my shame turned to anger and that's when I took action. I went online and filled out the standard customer service survey and directly asked for a refund. I pointed out that I wasn't sure how much I spent as I didn't save my receipt but that I bought the razor at Wal-Mart. Nothing to do now but kick back and wait for my check to arrive in the mail, right? Wrong!!! Instead I received this letter.......

....and I was pissed when I read it. I'm sure this letter is standard fare in the customer service game over at Bic, but I still couldn't believe it. In exchange for completing their homework assignment they offered me ...coupons? When I directly asked for a refund. I guess I was going to have to sing for my supper.

If you haven't figured it out from the title, I dig the Lazlo Toth letters. The idea of going against a huge corporation over six bucks was starting to look like a noble pursuit and I took action. I packed up everything I still had in my possession, the razor, all the blade cartridges, the shower holder, and even the $1 off coupon. With a little inspiration from my friend I sent them off to Bic along with this response.

I really can't wait to see what I get in return..... I'll keep you posted!

Sssh! Super Secret Spy Photos!

There has been a dead bug on the floor in the bathroom of my office for three weeks. It was there when I went on vacation and there when I came back. I told HR guy about it to no avail. When I ran into HR guy in the lunch room I told him I was going to take a picture of it every day with my cell phone to see how many I could rack up, he thought that was a funny idea. I had a feeling the bug was going to be around for a while so with HR's blessing I started logging the bugs progress in the loo. I snuck down yesturday after most people were gone and snapped a few photo's with my phone.


I was going to track how long it was going to take them to actually sweep the little fellow up, but when I came in this morning my friend was gone. I felt a little sad, I wanted to start taking bets on how long this would last. That's alright, I still have this drip of blood on the stall wall to keep me company. It's been there for a good six months, will it be there for six more? Probably.

"Three reasons why I was up at 4:00 a.m." or "A friend in bed?"

1. My faux down Ralph Lauren pillow* (who knew!) turns rock hard half way through the night with a giant dent where my head is. I awoke hardly able to move my neck. Yep, five hours later, still stiff.

2. My dog, the bed hog, insists on sleeping between my husband and I, horizontally! Plus, she throws off so much heat it's like having a nuclear reactor under the sheets. For weighing only 13 lbs. she's practically impossible to move.

3. Once I got back from the bathroom and adjusted the dog I was wide awake and sore. As I tried to get comfortable I noticed a strangely sweet smell in the room, like freshly baked sugar cookies. Seriously it was all I could focus on, it was definitely there and it was strong!
Now, I love ghost stories (even though they scare the shit out of me) so I know all the lore. For the next hour I laid in bed wide awake with my eyes peeled, sniffing the air. I was convinced there was a ghost in the room. I tried to rationalize it was a pleasant smell and must be a friendly ghost but there's no reasoning with an irrational me. Finally around 5:15 a.m. the smell faded and I fell back asleep.

I've been convinced that every house I've ever lived in has been haunted. I thought I caught a break because I've lived in this frickin' house for two years without an incident. I had become pretty confident there weren't any ghosts there, until now. Crapity Crap Crap! Let the paranoia begin, again.

*In Ralph's defense that pillow has to be 12 years old. I've bought many different ones over the years, but to paraphrase Pearl Jam "...Can't find a better (pillow)."

Want Some Coffee?

A couple of weeks ago someone got fired in my husbands office.

His used coffee mug is still sitting on his desk.

It's growing mold now.

I wonder how long it will be there before it's moved.

Update: the mug was finally thrown away three days after this posted.

Adventurous Me

I can't tell you how many times I have read in magazines (fashion, fitness, beauty) that a mashed up avocado is great for you hair - something about fatty acids adding moisture. It's Bullshit!!! I tried it yesterday and my hair felt like it had been over processed with chemicals or something. I totally freaked out in the shower.

Two conditioning treatments later and there has been some improvement but it's going to take me at least three more to get my hair back to it's soft and shiny self. I'm fuckin' pissed.