Some assholes he knows decided to be dicks on Thanksgiving and spray painted all over his car and his work truck. The purple paint really stands out against the champagne finish on his Civic. There was something drawn on the roof and I couldn't tell what it was. When I asked he just said, "it's cheese" in the saddest voice ever. Oh.
Jerks. Does this really look like a kid who deserves that? I know he can be a little shit, but he's a little shit with a heart of gold.
Wheeeeee!!!!!
Ta-da! Beef Pops! (I'm guessing) I never entertained the idea of these things actually counting as sustinance, they certainly didn't qualify as a meal. But, when you have a drunk and hungry boyfriend on your hands who's willing to eat anything the rules kinda go out the window. I know what you're thinking, "that's beef jerky, big deal". But I hate beef jerky (love Slim Jim's though), so the idea of meat lollipops are pretty gross to me. Besides, the big picture here is that these are Asian "beef" lollipops which means they could be made of practically anything; dog, cat, guinea pig... need I go on?
When we opened the packaging we were nearly bowled over by the smell. A mixture of beef and ass that one can only find in pre-packaged meats that need no refrigeration. It in no way made me want to try the treats inside. Nor did the greasy lubrication I assume they included to keep the meat 'moist', so it slides down the gullit more easily. Ideal, I'm sure, for the snacker on the run.
Boyfriend went first. He devoured half a meat pop in one bite. It tasted enough like beef jerky, but the texture begged to differ. It was chewy like it had been dehydrated and then rehydrated. Exactly what one looks for in a quality snack!
I went next and I believe the following picture sums up my reaction nicely......
Yeah. Besides my general hate for beef jerky something was not right there. Still, we polished off the whole package before we actually decided to do any further investigation (thanks alcohol). Even the Bean had some. Dogs.... she wasn't even drunk.
Here's where I feel I should mention that it wasn't until we were nearing the end of the packet that we noticed these weird swirly little objects peppered throughout the grease. Were they some sort of magical spices or were they tiny little rolled up worms? We weren't sure. Upon inspection we decided they probably weren't worms since they were visible through the clear packaging and these meat pops were heavily seasoned. Sometimes it's better for your own psyche to believe the less horrible of options, we were going to live blissfully in ignorance.
That lasted about three minutes.
Our bellies full, (and kinda rumbly) we decided to try and figure out what exactly we had just eaten. We were pretty sure it wasn't beef, and we hoped for Barski's sake it wasn't dog. I couldn't live with the idea of making my dog an involuntary cannibal. The only language on the packaging that wasn't a Chinese character accompanied what we assumed was the company mascot/logo in the corner of the packaging. Asia's answer to the Quaker Oats guy? Here's hoping!
There it is folks, Xiang Xiang, the only recognizable script on the packaging. We let our fingers do the walking with a quick internet search and found the company's website. It was in Chinese, but there was a translate to English option, perfect. There it was right on the home page, Xiang Xiang is China's number one maker of soy based foods. Whew... enter sigh of relief here. The texture wasn't cat after all, it was soy! Super.
Later I found this picture of Xiang Xiang soy skewers online except these ones look fucking delicious.
This summer's musical journey continues when I leave for Lollopalooza in a couple of hours. I'll give a full update of that when I get back. Then I wrap up the season back in Columbus for Modest Mouse at the LC Pavilion on Aug. 23rd.
I'd kill the zombie because frankly I don't want to sleep with or marry anything that wants to eat me......
I know it's just a bottle of gin, but it literally has my name on it. How rad is that? I do drink a lot, and always at the same bar, heck I finished that much of the bottle off myself Saturday night. I got drunk. I like to stick to gin, Kettle One vodka or Yuengling. Shots of Jagermeister are good, shots of Tullamore Dew are not, unless you like puking a little bit right there at the bar, not that it's ever happened to me.
How delicious does that look? It was a really nice night. I was totally relaxed and slept better than I had in weeks.
I was pretty proud of the resignation letter I had penned and admittedly had to edit it some the morning after because I got a little too brazen. Still everything in it is a fact, I didn't leave much room for opinion. I think it's professional with just the right amount of fuck you sprinkled in. I'm including a copy here in case you're interested. I changed some names, just in case. The only thing I forgot to mention is what a glowing review my boss gave me. Really, it was embarrassing, I was half expecting her to bend over and lick my ass. Know that Bill is the company owner, Chris is his son and Kelly is my direct superior. Darlene is Chris' fiance, she's only been there about a year now and runs around like she owns the place. She's not very popular among the staff and employs an "I try to make myself inaccessible" management style (her words). Both Bill and Chris just bought new BMW's within the last two months and Darlene is sporting a three carat rock easy.
26 March 2009
Attn: HR Guy
Recently my performance, willingness to be a team player and over all dedication to (this company) has become suspect. I would like a chance to clear up a few issues that may have been overlooked.
I first started with (this company) as a receptionist. It was my beginning with a department that works alongside many others that helped foster a sense of community with other departments in the company. When I moved to Intake I still backed up reception as well as helped the consulting case managers and worked on side projects for other departments. I was on my own for several months while in Intake and still found time to write a revised training manual.
When I was offered the position of Medical Records Supervisor I still helped cover the intake phones while training my replacement. This was quite a task while I tried to get my bearings in a new department where I had only received about six hours of training. I wrote a department procedure manual since there wasn’t one left behind from prior management. I also took over transcription editing from Kelly, began to scan documents/credentials for Provider Relations, and worked on several special projects for different departments. When Oracle came along I gave up a week of my time to help enter patients into the new system. I have always been willing to back up Intake when needed and have offered my assistance to any other department that may have needed it. I cut back in personnel in Medical Records and even took work home that didn’t require a computer.
I’m guessing that Bill and Chris chose to ‘evaluate’ my work day the way they did because of the problems with this department before I arrived here (even though I’m the sole reason that management was made aware of those issues). That of course coupled with Kelly's ignorance as to what my daily functions are. I would have happily detailed my job requirements and even shown/trained someone had I been asked in a dignified manor. My only regret now is that I outlined everything so cohesively in my training manual.
By the time I received my review for the 2008 work year it was forty days past due. I was prepared to ask for the hefty raise I believe I deserved and had provided Kelly with a history of positive changes I had made within my department to support my request. I was denied additional compensation and give what I now affectionately refer to as the three percent insult. I understand economic times are tough so I tried to negotiate compensation by requesting extra vacation days. Two extra days wouldn’t have cost the company anything but would have kept me loyal and willing. I was told that vacation days were nonnegotiable. I questioned that fact citing that Darlene hadn’t even been employed with (this company) for a year, yet she had been off for six weeks since she started with the company. During my negotiations with Kelly I also conceded that perhaps Darlene’s situation was more a product of nepotism considering the fact that she’ s engaged to (this company's) Vice President.
Up until this point in my history with (this company) I had been willing to do whatever was asked of me. I was loyal to a fault, even spending Thanksgiving of 2008 separating cocs so I would have them ready to scan the next day. I never received any overtime pay for the work I took home. When Chris quit I doubled my scanning efforts. I would have happily worked overtime, but management refused to allow me that option. Eventually, with no help and no incentive, I had a moment of clarity. I decided for self preservation's sake I couldn’t do another person’s job without any additional compensation. I would no longer try to make up the sixteen hours a week Chris scanned. I was going to concentrate solely on my own job duties.
Without someone scanning charts on a regular basis I soon began to see a change in the work that was to be done. There were fewer charts to be indexed now. Also, there were fewer transcription edits due to changes implemented in the clinics. Plus, because scanning was so backed up there were fewer add-ons to look up and scan. I found I had about an hour extra a day depending on the volume of requests I received. For the record, the week I was ‘monitored’ I ate lunch at my desk three times, accounting for an hour and a half of Internet usage. I must say that I’m baffled that Bill was so outraged that one of his employees would let time pass so fruitlessly as I did. If only he had felt that way when I was in reception and he was calling for an hour to an hour and a half almost daily. I could have been spared the intimate details of his family life and it would have saved me a lot of grief from jealous peers.
I find myself caught in a vicious cycle where not being compensated for my hard work keeps me from giving my all and not trying my hardest makes me think badly of myself. I’m sorry, but there’s no way in hell I’m training my replacement. You’ve already decided my worth, my backs against the wall - I quit.
Most Sincerely
Wendo27
Awesome, right!!! I know it's childish to rock the boat like that, but when it comes to family functions I have to entertain myself.
sidenote: I totally didn't get the Pac Man theme until I wore this shirt ...twice. When I bought it the thought process was more like; Astronaut-check, Astroghosts-check, bad-ass t-shirt that looks like it was made for me - sold!
There's a place by my house that makes the best donuts. As a matter of fact, sister has been down in the dumps lately, so to cheer up her Friday in hopes she'll have a good weekend I stopped and got her a donut on our way to work. She buzzed me later in the morning and said, "This is the freshest most delicious pink donut I've had in a year!" Yep, they're that good, and well pink sprinkles make anything taste better!
Coincidence? I think not. No wonder Chevy's donuts are so good, look how happy he looks up top in his bakers hat. He's a damn sight more chipper than Fred the Baker. Always bitching that it was time to make the donuts. Dude, national TV is hardly the outlet to complain if you're unhappy with your chosen profession.
Looking all smug with his Hitler mustache. Nice farmers tan, Fred.
The best Christmas present I received this year was a collection of The Middleman comic books. I read it in like, three days, and then read it again. The art is great and the story phenomenal!!!
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